music ringing true

This week on my commute I put on the album “The Hymn Project” by Buller, Balzer & Aichele, and their version of “I’d Rather Have Jesus”  on repeat. Hearing the lyrics over and over, made me think about how truthfully I could repeat them.

I’d rather have Jesus than silver or gold,
I’d rather be His than have riches untold
I’d rather have Jesus than houses or land,
Yes, I’d rather be led by His nail-pierced hand.

Than to be the king of a vast domain
And be held in sin’s dread sway
I’d rather have Jesus than anything
This world affords today. (chorus)

I’d rather have Jesus than worldly applause,
I’d rather be faithful to His dear cause
I’d rather have Jesus than worldwide fame,
I’d rather be true to His holy name.

He’s fairer than lilies of rarest bloom,
He’s sweeter than honey from out the comb;
He’s all that my hungering spirit needs,
I’d rather have Jesus and let Him lead.

The truth of my answer hurts. So often I want other things. Maybe not to be king, or seek man’s applause. But it breaks my heart to realize the inferior sweetness of honey (really, snacks/treats in general), allusion of control of my circumstances, relishing and lingering too much in comfort; these are in idolized places in my life.

My Bible was open to Psalm 34 but I ended up reading the nearby chapter that spoke to my ache in the above admitted condition of my heart.

“Finally, I confessed all my sins to you
and stopped trying to hide my guilt.
I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.”
And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone.

Therefore, let all the godly pray to you while there is still time,
that they may not drown in the floodwaters of judgment.
For you are my hiding place;
you protect me from trouble.
You surround me with songs of victory.” Psalm 32:5-7

Jesus longs for us to return to Him. Time and agian you can see in the parables He tells, He wants us to do a complete about face from where we had been going and turn instead to our soverign King, loving Shephard, gracious Saviour, abiding Friend, Himself. We are to shout His praise in anticiaption of the known coming victory, whether that be looking forward to the release of the bondage of sugar addiction, or the walls of Jericho falling down after the loud shout of praise from the people. (Joshua 6:20)

The chorus of another hymn comes to mind in which is Jesus speaking to us:

“‘Come home, come home. All you who weary, come home!’ Softly and tenderly, Jesus is calling, calling ‘Oh sinner, come home.'”

I know that He is faithful to forgive (1John 1:9), and pray that in the Spirit’s power I will be able to continue to turn my eyes toward Jesus, the author and perfector of my faith. (Hebrews 12).

As an older chorus says,

“Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace.”

What beautiful words! I am very thankful to have so many songs with Biblical lyrics running through my head, encouraging me and providing words when I don’t know how to express myself.

The devotional I had today ended with a prayer written by Wendy Speake in her 40 Day Sugar Fast book, worth ending with: “I choose to set my face toward You today. As I wait to see You move, I will sing Your praises and eagerly anticipate Your deliverance. In Jesus’s name, Amen”

clean hearts

After reading the creation story and hearing how Adam and Eve had to choose to listen to God or to the snake, our littest (currently 3.5 years) and I talked about how God wants us to listen to Him, and that when we don’t there are consequences. Our hearts get “dirty” and we need Jesus to come clean our hearts, to help us listen to God again. I asked her if she wanted Jesus to come into her heart and clean it, and she gave the answer “Yes!” with the inflection/implication “why wouldn’t you want that?”

I hesitated to share this with others initially, as I wanted to ensure it wasn’t just a whim, and that she was understanding more than just one bedtime story’s narrative. A few days later, we were reading through another story from her Bible and were chatting about how Pharaoh’s heart must have been really dirty because he sure didn’t listen to God (when God was telling him to let the Israelites leave Egypt). When it was prayer time, I asked if she wanted Jesus to clean her heart. “But mom, he already did!”

Happy that she remembered that chat a week before and inspired that she was understanding, I tried my best to explain to her 3 year old mind a few things. “You know how we clean our room, but then it’s messy again? We have to keep cleaning it? Our hearts are sort of like that. Now that Jesus is in our hearts, we need to keep asking Jesus to clean our hearts too, take away all the bad things we do, so we can listen to Him again.” That seemed to click for her, and so we asked Jesus to come clean our hearts again, say sorry for the wrong things we did.

The next night we had a story about Kind David, how he was singing his thanks to God. We always ask at night time prayer what they’re thankful for. She started going on about what David’s prayers might have been like. “Jesus you’re awesome! Jesus you’re the funniest! Jesus you’re great! …What else would David be thanking God for mommy?” It warms the heart to see their interpretations.

Thanks to those of you that pray for parents raising families that love the King of Kings. It truly takes a village – and I’m thankful everyday for the one we’re a part of. Raising girls that love Jesus is an awesome responsibility and we love your support in this. I hope our sharing some stories like this of their growth encourages you too.

reset

Confessions time.

For all the possibilities and opportunities for staying tuned in spiritually, I’ve been doing a poor job lately. It’s not for lack of awareness. My social media is ripe with Bible verses, devotionals and posts about Jesus. My music play list is either nature or worship songs and Bible related podcasts. There’s something deeper that’s not wanting to respond, and that’s the part that finally made me stop and assess.

As the silly but true saying goes “just because you’re in a garage, it does not make you a car” – Yes, the thoughts and teachings of Jesus are all around me, but am I really affected by it?

A part of my heart has become prideful and lazy at the same time, developing a callous to the desire to spend one on one time with my Bible or in prayer. Relationships start to fade if not given time and effort and my relationship with Jesus is suffering.

Being convicted of this, and actually wanting to do something about  (not shove the feeling aside this time) I’ve decided to do a couple things.

The “40 day sugar fast” I participated in back in January was wonderful for my soul. I am going to start my own 40 days, starting today. If nothing else, go through those verses they had and devotionals, while turning my distracted and false cravings to the only One who can truly satisfy.

I would also like to finish off writing out the book of John, that I started during Lent. (sorry if you thought that was already done, I kept finding other “more important/urgent” things to do… sigh, how easily I believe those lies!)
It’s never too late to come back to the open arms of Jesus, who’s always waiting for us with unconditional love. (Luke 15:11-32, Psalm 143:8, Micah 7:18, Hebrews 10:23-25, Ephesians 3:16-19, Romans 13:14)

Thank you for your faithfulness Jesus!

Great is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father;
There is no shadow of turning with Thee,
Thou changest not, Thy compassions they fail not,
As Thou hast been, Thou forever wilt be.

Great is Thy faithfulness! Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided,
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me!

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest,
Sun, moon, and stars in their courses above;
Join with all nature in manifold witness,
To Thy great faithfulness, mercy, and love.

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth,
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide;
Strength for today, and bright hope for tomorrow
Blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside.

-Thomas Chisholm